Humour Laughter Smiles

Sunday

Professional hazards

 A man was walking down the street in Dublin when he heard a woman screaming and detected a faint smell of burning in the air.He ran down the  street and around a corner and saw a huge group of people standing watching a blazing building.  On the tenth floor of the building, a woman, clutching a bundle to her chest, was leaning out of a window screaming for someone to save her baby.
 
 The man stepped forward and called up to the woman, "Throw down your baby and I'll catch it!" No!  No!"  the woman shouted back.  "You might miss or drop my baby and she'll be killed!".
 "No  I won't!" shouted the man.  "I am Alec Maguire.  I'm the goalkeeper for Ireland's National Soccer team.  I've never missed a match in ten years  and in all that time I've only let the ball into the net 10 times."
 
 "What?  Is that all?" called the woman.
 
  "Yes!"  shouted back the man.  "Every football player in the world agrees that I am the best goal keeper there has ever been."
 
 And with that he adopted the goal keepers stance - legs apart, slightly bent at the knees, body lightly bent forward at the waist, arms stretched  downwards at a slight angle away from his body with palms facing forward.
 
 "OK !"  screamed the woman.  "I'll trust you.  I've no choice!  Here she comes!"
 
 So with the flames roaring all around her, the woman threw the baby from the window.  However the edge of the baby's shawl caught on the woman's  watch sending the child spinning off to one side, tumbling head over heels  with her little arms and legs flailing.  The woman screamed and the crowd  gasped, all sure that the baby was going to perish because she was falling  out of the reach of the man.  Alec remained motionless as the child  descended, spinning and tumbling further and further away from him as she  came. Then when the baby was only feet from hitting the ground the man  dived a full 30 feet across the sidewalk, caught the baby in his  outstretched  right hand, pulled her in towards his chest and shielded her body with his  left arm.He hit the ground heavily on his right side and lay motionless on  the pavement for a few seconds.  Then slowly, he raised himself to his  feet and turned to face the crowd.  They were awe struck.  Then the crowd  erupted with cheers and the woman, still in danger herself, nearly fainted  with relief.
 
 The man still clutching the child to his chest in his right arm, waved to  the crowd, bounced the baby twice on the ground, and kicked her 60 yards  down the street.
 
 

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